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Help For Your Depression - Help For Your Depression

You Are Not Alone

July 14th 2009 21:47


So, how does it feel to know that there are millions of other people that are probably feeling the same way you are right now? Somewhere along God’s green earth there is another human being, animal, or let me just say sentient being that is feeling sadness, and depression. It might comfort you to think that perhaps not too far away there is another person feeling anger and rage, jealousy and bone chilling fear, or perhaps the overwhelming feeling of grief you are feeling at this very moment is being felt all over the world by people that are grieving over the loss of a pet or a loved one. Whatever the pain you experience, do you look to connect to all that may be suffering as a way of coming to terms with your own pain?


There are some people that can do this to a certain level. And then there are those that tell you that they know what you are feeling, they know what you are going through. These well balanced travelers speak as if they have been to the highest peaks and back again, only to tell you that they got through it and so can you. They will even be so kind as to tell you how and what you are doing wrong based upon their own experience, which really doesn’t mean a thing because after all, it was their own experience, not yours.

It is always good to have others to bounce things off of, and if you are in any kind of recovery from mental illness or substance abuse (same thing), then having people as supports are vital in developing a ritual that can keep your life in balance.


But the main part is you. Find out what makes you tick. Find out what you got. Self esteem is an ongoing discovery. Things on the outside can give us self esteem. Things such as a job, a relationship, and hobbies can help pull us up off the ground and give us a sense of self, a feeling that we can look other people in the eyes and feel good about who we are. These things can give us confidence that grows stronger with the knowledge that we are pulling our own weight, not having to rely on anyone but ourselves. But self esteem doesn’t hold up very well when it is based upon things. What happens when these things don‘t last? What is left? The foundation of a job and a relationship and all the other surface stuff isn’t very strong and it can only hold up as long as these things remain in place. I often wonder how much we hide behind these superficial things.

Working can be very rewarding for some, yet for me I always found it wanting. By simply holding down a job, we are showing that we are just another Bozo on the bus, capable of the same ole same old shit, different day. And pursuing a “career” can be frustrating because sometimes we think that once we get outta school and land that big job, that we will have arrived! This sorta works for some, but how do you explain all those unhappy people out there?

It is easy to fall into the same trap with relationships. Society seems to tell us that we need to have the basic stuff down: A job, money, a place to live, and of course a member of the opposite sex with whom to share our biggest dreams with! Isn’t that exciting???
If that is what makes you happy, if that keeps you afloat. Perhaps you are doing yourself injustice by this narrow thinking. It’s up to you. Show them what you got!
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Abilify My Eye

July 1st 2009 05:11
BACKWORD or forward?


Hello fellow travelers out there in mental health land! How does this day find you? Are you enjoying this blessed day and learning to accept yourself for who you are and taking life as it comes? Or have you fallen prey to your own humanness and found yourself dangling through the cracks of the ill fated mental health system? Well, keep your head up high my comrades, for the mental health field has come a long way since the days of chaining people to the walls. I mean after all, there will always be some sort of stigma attached to mental health, because if you really try and break it all down, this is all in our heads. And there are those among us who feel that people who need to see a psychiatrist, ought to have their head examined. So here’s the deal, if you are bipolar, and you have substance abuse in your history, let’s face it, your just a drunk and or addict. Take care of those main problems, and you should be okay.
I always wonder about the bad rap folks with bipolar get. They always seem to start drinking and drugging when they stop taking the meds. There is an important question that is rarely addressed; why do they stop taking the meds? For some, they might feel as though they are cured and no longer need to take the meds, then there are those that may feel as though the meds are increasing the symptoms, making the mania worse, the anxiety worse, the irritability worse, and even though using alcohol and drugs may not be the answer, and we can whole heartedly admit truth by our own past experiences of taking this road over and over again, however relief is relief, no matter how short it may be, there is some sort of release from the pain and suffering.
I am not too concerned with all the new meds and all the new studies that have been done because it is all hogwash when it gets applied to different lives.
My doctor referred me to a “Specialist” on bipolar. This particular doctor doesn’t have bipolar so if they are in fact a specialist, I don’t know how affective they would be.
Medication has always been a sore spot for me personally. I have never responded well to any medication, at least long term. Six months is the longest that they last until things start going haywire. I experience thoughts and feelings that are far worse than what I originally began taking the medication for. When we arrive at this juncture, I sometimes wonder if we get too whacked out to determine which way is up and we lose the ability to be our own advocates while losing the ability to gain a different perspective that could help us get by with out the added side effects and side effects from the side effects.
Either way, I have come to this crossroads again.
oh lawdy, lawdy help me

I told my new doctor that sometimes meds do not make things better or worse, they just seem to make them different. Her response was, “That is a good choice of words, and they SEEM to make things different”.
Perhaps I can use the perspective I have gained from a clear mind and realize that the mere thought of going back on medication only seems to be the answer to help me get through this rough crossroads. This is not the same crossroads as before, it only seems that way.


And if the cloud bursts, thunder in your ear
You shout and no one seems to hear.
And if the band you're in starts playing different tunes
I'll see you on the dark side of the moon.
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The Medication Maze

June 3rd 2008 05:53
Medications can be a touchy subject.There is always the risk of side effects that seem to make you wonder if you really feel bad enough to go through the painful period of starting a new med,getting used to it,then realizing it isn't right for you,so you have to come off of it.Then you are prescribed another medication and you have to go through all that again.That's at least 8 weeks of pure volcanic hell.After a while you get to feel as though you got hit upside the head with a sledge hammer.I like to use the anology of a boxer getting knocked to his knees,then as he gains his balance and attempts to fight again,he is hit again.It is just like being on a therapeutic dose and having another attack of the depression so what happens? The medication level gets raised and you get knocked to your knees again.



Some medications seem to increase the depressive symptoms.it is difficult to determine if it is in fact,the depression. Or is it the medication?.
One of the ways to deal with this game is to make sure that you really need to be on
meds. The theory that depression usually starts because of some event.A loss of a loved one,loss of job,family,home.This can be looked at in some cases .For some, the depression has been there for a long time.It can change over time, it either gets better or worse or stays dormant.This is where you have to look deep down and see if you can work through it.The medications are so powerful,they can turn your life upside down.And if you have responsibilities that have to be met,they can make even the most simple tasks seem huge.
There are all kinds of meds that work on certain transmitters of the brain.There are different
parts of the brain that these meds are supposed to target.To be honest,it makes my head spin.All that we know is how we feel.Explaing about how or why or where these medications work does nothing.It can be a crap shoot.The field of psychiatry is complex and there are so many factors to take into consideration.Most doctors want to help but it might feel as though we are "rats" in an experiment.



In those times of darkness,when you don't know which way is up,think hard about what is going to make you feel better.The pain of the depression might not be as bad as the side effects,and that feeling of doing "The Thorazine Shuffle" all over again.







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