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Emotional Rescue

July 29th 2008 02:37
Emotions


During the course of a minute, my brain is processing so much information at lightening speed. It actually makes my head spin. It’s like four seasons in one day, especially if there is a lot going on in my life. Back in the 90’s, I was hospitalized four times in a three month period, all in the same facility. It was my home away from home. The staff used to have this group every afternoon that was designed to help patients cope with their illness by attempting to educate them. There we were, listening to a woman wearing cheap costume jewelry talk about how stress can cause depression. So, if stress causes depression, one would think that you need to cut out as much stress in your life. That isn’t always possible for some people. The key is realizing when the emotions are rising, and be aware that you are heading for a storm. Although back in 1996, that storm lasted for almost ten years and tore apart a perfectly good marriage. The main problem may be fighting these natural emotions. If you let those feelings and thoughts get the best of you, it can lead to a fall into a deep whole that you may never get out of. This is the point where the pain is so bad, that some actually take their lives. I have tried to take my life several times, none of which were successful: At least as far as I know.

When the feelings start to take over and we can’t identify them, we become fearful. But even if we were able to identify what it is that we are feeling would that make it any better?

My experience the last three years has been rocky. Along with the ups and downs of every day life, there are always situations that arise that bring on heavy emotions. Most folks don’t experience those feelings as extreme as those with substance abuse, addiction, and mental illness. (Alcoholism and addiction are in fact a mental illness. They are both the same problem, but that is fuel for a future article)
We let things that people say or do get blown way out of proportion, based upon over stimulation and being off balance. These reactions are much more extreme than the average person. These reactions come out as neuroticism that causes people to turn away, which explains why drunks and addicts have stormy relations even though they are clean and sober. A feeling of inadequacy takes over and can cause another fall into all kinds of emotions that have never been felt before, and can lead back to booze and or drugs to kill the pain. What a tangled web we weave, eh? It sucks to be a drunk and an addict because there are so many pitfalls to look out for and sometimes we don’t even know when we have fallen until it is too late.
Support groups can be a life saving tool to get through these hard times, because we are interacting with people that are going through the same thing we are. There is a slogan in one of the 12 step programs: “You Are Not Alone.” That slogan pissed me off when I first saw it because I didn’t get it. It caused me to think that it is sad that other people are going through crap too, and it brought up those negative thoughts where I just KNEW the world was a f-----ed up place! In some way it is a scary place, but there is more beauty in it than we think.
Emotions Anonymous is also a great support group; you can look it up on the web for meetings in your area.
Keep the faith!
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The Medication Maze (LINK)

June 3rd 2008 05:53
Medications can be a touchy subject.There is always the risk of side effects that seem to make you wonder if you really feel bad enough to go through the painful period of starting a new med,getting used to it,then realizing it isn't right for you,so you have to come off of it.Then you are prescribed another medication and you have to go through all that again.That's at least 8 weeks of pure volcanic hell.After a while you get to feel as though you got hit upside the head with a sledge hammer.I like to use the anology of a boxer getting knocked to his knees,then as he gains his balance and attempts to fight again,he is hit again.It is just like being on a therapeutic dose and having another attack of the depression so what happens? The medication level gets raised and you get knocked to your knees again.



Some medications seem to increase the depressive symptoms.it is difficult to determine if it is in fact,the depression. Or is it the medication?.
One of the ways to deal with this game is to make sure that you really need to be on
meds. The theory that depression usually starts because of some event.A loss of a loved one,loss of job,family,home.This can be looked at in some cases .For some, the depression has been there for a long time.It can change over time, it either gets better or worse or stays dormant.This is where you have to look deep down and see if you can work through it.The medications are so powerful,they can turn your life upside down.And if you have responsibilities that have to be met,they can make even the most simple tasks seem huge.
There are all kinds of meds that work on certain transmitters of the brain.There are different
parts of the brain that these meds are supposed to target.To be honest,it makes my head spin.All that we know is how we feel.Explaing about how or why or where these medications work does nothing.It can be a crap shoot.The field of psychiatry is complex and there are so many factors to take into consideration.Most doctors want to help but it might feel as though we are "rats" in an experiment.



In those times of darkness,when you don't know which way is up,think hard about what is going to make you feel better.The pain of the depression might not be as bad as the side effects,and that feeling of doing "The Thorazine Shuffle" all over again.







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